Schmamuel and Micah-Man

When the boys were first born, I read a quote that has influenced my view on these last few months.

Anna Quindlen - "The biggest mistake I made (as a parent) is the one that most of us make....I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture (of my three children) sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages six, four, and one. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less." (Loud and Clear, 2004, 10-11)

While I was pregnant I had so many questions about how I would cope with the responsibilities of two infants. It definitely took some getting used to and during some of those middle-of-the-night hours, with blurry vision and fatigued mind I would robotically perform the motherhood-tasks. Then the quote that I included would come to mind and would fuel me as I remembered that those moments are so precious and they pass by so quickly. So I would hesitate to have a few more seconds of a snuggle before putting the bundled boy back into his crib.

  I haven't done it perfectly by any means, but I am proud of the fact that I can remember quite a few times that I've come into the moment and stored it in my heart rather than rushing back to bed to savor those extra seconds of sleep.

People often ask me, "What is it like having twins?" I don't know really how to answer them. I often tell them what I think they are expecting to hear. "Busy." I say. Truth, but I don't have time to tell them everything.

They are not "the twins" to me. They are my boys. Samuel and Micah. Schmamuel and Micah-Man. Bubble and Monkey. Little goofs who enjoy when the sound "g" comes up in conversation. They squirm with delight when I come in their rooms to get them after a nap. Stuffed animals don't stand a chance against their iron grip and their gnawing power. Their little socks fall off all of the time and their bald spots are prominent. They are ticklish under their chins and they open their mouth wide in a smile when they are lifted up into the air. 

  Last night the boys both slept 11 hours through the night. A miracle! But I feel a tiny bit of sadness today because I know they are going to quickly morph from infants to toddlers and then toddlers to children. I will try my best to watch with my heart open.